Yeah, that's me being the best man at Nuria and Rafael's wedding. More on that later. Click the pretty picture and visit their site. Back already? Ok read on.......

"How I Spent My Summer Vacation" by Jose E. Roman, age 33. lol.

I flew from Trashville to San Juan via Miami. Pretty straightforward flight. Flew in on a Wendesday and decided to take a cab home to surprise my parents. It was enlightening. Three years is quite a time when you see the changes in the city. The city changed mayors in my absence and it shows. At least in the parts near my house is a bit more messy than usual. New government also so they sort of changed the bus routes. I went home and saw that it needed some maintenance. Shit. I don't mind coming back, especially since my parents are quite old, still the task of taking care of your parents and running the house is quite intimidating.

I believe in having as few attachments as possible. Little or no complications. Then again, I'm also fiercely loyal to the few people that touch my heart. My parents, among them. I arrive and surprise them. Yes, they're getting old. I got to see my foster grandma briefly. Yes, I miss them. I think of how much I would've loved to come home and introduced my ex-girlfriend and the babies to them. Oh well. I drop my bags, talk to them and then get some rest. Outside, it's raining. I guess the weather has a way of mirroring where my heart was.

It's still raining and I start making phonecalls to the usual gang of suspects to see what's up. Noel is spinning at Pablo's new bar, Candela. I'm trying to get a ride, but no dice. Shit. Jose Ramon chickens out because of the rain, but I get Andres' number. I call him and he tells me: "Clayrol is leaving tonight for NYU Film School. Full scholarship. We're getting together and I'm coming to get you." It's on.

Andy arrives with a girl and another friend. We drive to an old rehearsal studio in Hato Rey. Descojon Urbano and Hijos de Cain used to rehearse there. In the rehearsal studio are the fine folks of La Experiencia de Toñito Cabanilla$$$. They've got a new bass player, Angel, from La Murga R.I.P. We start talking and shooting the shit. They have a new CD out on Sept the 7th. Rehearsing. There's a get together at El Quenepo on Friday and aparty at Cusa's house that Saturday, which I didn't end up going. It was good to see them. I catch up with local gossip.

We head to el Cojo, a bar near a place i used to live in Eleanor Roosevelt ave. (Mondo Bizarro, that takes another story), and it's closing. No problem. We go to the lesbian bar 2 doors down. The DJ and the bouncer are the only males in the bar until we arrive. 4 guys and two girls. We head to the pool table and start a game and order drinks. Everyone's cool. I ended up at the bar talking with the bartender about the neighborhood and talking trash. Really cool.

We head back home and I missed Noel's set. It was a good start.

THe next week I spend it going to Old San Juan and running into my old mates. Chino, Berty and Rauly out of their heads. Jose Ramon and Pipo, a new acquaintance. Ran into Ivy (an ex. Long story) on the telephone. We had the best conversation in years. It was fun to hear her mad rantings. We were very civil, which was cool. I also ran into Yanira. A good friend. Wanted to see her badly.

Also hung out at the radio station on Saturday and did a show. Really cool shit. Ran into the new gang at the radio show called frecuencias alternas. Iohann, Eliezer, Angel Luis and the gang are doing a great job down there. Fucking mad props and love to them.

I also saw Alberto from the old crowd at the UPR, and some friends from back in the hood. Carlitos, Davidcito. Damn. We've grown old. "Has The World Changed Or Have I Changed?" - The Smiths. People marry, divorce, kids. Meanwhile I'm still single. No kids. Heh. Saw "A.I." and "The Others". A.I. what can I say? Spielberg added so much fluff to it. Still the love thing bugged me. Because I know how badly it gets. How love is such a motherfucker. I loved madly and deeply. Left and I'm paying the price. I wonder if I'll ever love someone like that again. Watch "The Others". What a movie. The mute girl reminds me of Lana. Looks just like her. Am I going insane? Fuck, her memory haunts me.

Also ran into Myriam. Jose Ramon's ex. Beautiful woman. Married and a baby. Damn.

I didn't get to see so much people it's unreal. I'm fucking sorry.

Played a show with Local 12 at Rumba at Old San Juan. The day before leaving. It was good to play and see some friends over there. Next time I want to do it with a guitar player. Get some more noise.

Went back home to Nashville for a day. Did something really dumb. Called Lana. Just to hear her voice, yeah I still love her but she's an ice maiden. Gone. All my own fault. Sometimes I regret leaving, but I always come back to that lovely Butthole Surfers lyric: "Well son, a funny thing about regret is, it is better to regret something you have done, than something you haven't done." Her voice still move me, but I have no illusions. It's over. I loved her and did every possible thing for her. Walk in beauty baby.

Next day and armed with a new laptop I headed for Orlando, met Rafy and Nuria and had a blast. Originally I was gonna give away the bride but I ended up being the best man. The wedding was done at Rafy's boss' home. Gorgeous house near two lake. I knew Rafy's boss back in the day where I worked in the union with them. Cool place. The wedding and reception were beautiful. Nuria was gorgeous. Everyone else was crying. I kept my emotions in check. Of the four couples that hung together three years ago. Two of them made it. Oh well. It was good to be a part of it. And Nuria and Rafy were very gracious hosts. Thanks.

We drove to the airport to find out that my flight was delayed, but if I took it, I would miss my connection to Trashville. The airline put me in a hotel until the next morning. I barely made it back to Nashville just in time for work. At the end of the day I fell asleep and missed the Bella Morte / Cruxshadows show at Club Voodoo. Shit. Back to the usual silliness.

I don't want to stay here. Not unless a powerful reason. I came to Trashville to give my then girl, the babies and me a new start. It left me broke and alone. Fuck it. Unless something powerful happens. I don't see myself here anymore. I don't necessarily want to go back to Puerto Rico. Still... I feel I'm ready for something. I need change. Crave it.