Four years ago...

We would go together since Thursday night until Sunday evening. Partying, dancing, enjoying life. We would go to a bar have a few drinks, dance our pants off or catch a movie. Go home, sleep. We were high on energy, endorphins and whatever else the night brought us. I remember going to the club dancing and coming back to one of our houses just to chat. Then crashing in someone's living room or porch. Sleeping my worries away so I could take the bus home next morning and off to work. At night repeat the same cycle. We were happy, younger and free.

I left after a dream that needed to be followed. I left the rest of you behind. We all dealt with life. My dream went crashing down but the rest of you found your mates and married. It was ironic that I was the one wanting to get married and you got married instead. Four years later I come back, broken. I'm happy some of us got the girl/guy and got married. I'm happy that at least I was the best man in your wedding. I just wished I had the girl and the kids. Loneliness can be so fucking miserable sometimes.

And it was my fault. And it's all gone.

Love,

Jose